Dear Mr. Trump:
First, thank you for what you are doing for the USA. Your honesty and courage has helped bring this great nation together working towards higher goals like I have not seen in years.
I don’t actually care much for politics. In fact, I willing de-registered myself from the voter rolls after the last presidential election. My friends would probably call me very cynical, however I am working to improve that. I do find this campaign very interesting however and you are very entertaining and smart. Keep up the great work.
I know that you are an avid golfer, in fact probably much more so and better than our current commander in chief. After your campaign settles down and your term in office starts, I would imagine that you would be playing a few rounds of golf to relax and mediate a bit. As such, you will want to ensure that your golf game is of the best caliber.
Therefore, I am offering my services as a Caddie to help with your golf game!
Now I am not just some schmuck. I legitimately am a great caddie and will ensure that you have a solid round of golf. I have caddied at three USGA events and have the expertise to ensure that your golf game is at the elite level. I also have over 3 years of caddie experience at a prestigious golf course in the San Francisco Bay Area. I am an avid golfer myself, traveling across the world to play golf. When you travel to California, let me know and let’s get a round going!
Together, we will not only Make America Great, but we can Make Golf Great Again!
Fairways and Greens,